Sunday, December 18, 2011

worst mom ever - confession #1

today marks 6 weeks and i can't believe it. the time has flown by incredibly fast and it feels like with each passing week, this little face develops more and more. wyatt's personality is starting to shine through, making me that much more excited for each of his many stages. when he was three days old, i can remember laying in my bed looking at him and feeling sad that he was "already three days old" and sad that "time was going by way too fast". i can remember tearing up for the first time since he was born and wanting time to stop. i honestly wanted him to stay that size forever. at 6 weeks i can tell you how excited i am for tomorrow. this week, wyatt has started to find his little voice - responding to ty and i when we talk to him with a little coo here and there. my new favorite thing he's doing is what i will go ahead and call his "pre-cry". his lip curls in and his eyes gloss over with what will become a large crocodile tear if i don't pick him up right that second. if i don't pick him up at that very moment, his eyes tightly close and i get this face:

wyatt was sick all week and still sounds pretty "phlemmy". i too got sick on thursday, and have been fighting it all weekend. not fun, but i will say that "little dude man" (as ty likes to call him) was easy on his mama the last few nights - only waking up once in the middle of the night and then up at 6 to hang with daddy. (still LOVING this time to sleep!)

i do have a guilty mom confession to make that i believe is worth making note of for myself - you know, when i start to get really confident as a mom and get perfect. ya right. hence the title of this blog. i am realistic enough to know there will be more. more "worst mom ever" moments. here goes...

on wednesday i met with two friends. thinking i could time it perfectly with feedings, i scheduled them back to back. not smart. at all. i ended up in the parking lot, in the back seat of my car feeding wyatt while texting date #2 that i was going to be late. this isn't even my confession. after date #2, as if i hadn't learned my lesson with my horrible timing after date #1, the ride home turned into a mother's nightmare. i was still about 15 minutes away from home when it happened. loud, "i'm not going to stop until i have boob" cries from the back seat. on 405. in traffic. i had the poor kid SO bundled up. as if my car was a 1981 honda with no heat. as if i lived in alaska. we had an under shirt, a thick long sleeve shirt, closed feet pants, a bundle me, a hat... you name it. any and everything that i could possibly have to keep my sweet baby warm. warm? let's try stifling freaking hot. so add this mess to a pissed off 5 and a half week old and what do you get?

a horrible heat rash.

i know.

mother of the year.

so add the heat rash to some baby acne and a cold and you get one not so fun baby. i felt horrible. actually, i felt beyond horrible. my aunt who is also a pediatrician did her best to make me feel better and say it's "totally normal" and "it's not that bad" but i still obsessed over it until, well today. it's gone today. the reminder of "my worst mom ever" moment has now passed but i will say - lesson freaking learned.

this week should be filled with less sick and rash and more fun! until then, here are some of my favorite iphone pics of the week (and can i tell you how much i love instagram - i was able to take some adorable pics and hide the baby acne and rash pretty dang well if i say so myself!):


1 comment:

  1. Hi sweetie. Thank you for your authenticity, I know other mom's reading this will relate and I can not tell how how important it is to be able to relate to little imperfections like this. We all have stories like this one; I have several. I remember them with such clarity that I can only assume that these experiences are what eventually earns us a quiet, humbled wisdom over time. I'll let you know when I get there!
    Love, Kristin Dibeh


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